Posts Tagged ‘Self Improvement’

A new job, losing your job, moving to a new location, unexpected expenses, illnesses, automobile breaking down, flight delayed or canceled. There are a number of unexpected changes that happen everyday in our lives. Some we can work to prevent and some we have no control over at all. All we can really do is manage them the best we can and accept that they will continue to keep happening.

Sometimes we need change in our lives. What may seem like a disaster could actually turn out to be one of the best things in your life. Your car breaking down in the middle of nowhere allows you to meet the perfect companion or being fired from a job allows you to finally start the career you always wanted to do. It’s easy to feel that all the bad things happen to you and just give up. The people who get a head are the ones who accept the changes and find the opportunities in them. Like the old saying goes, “turn lemons into lemonade”.

Prepare for Change
Some changes can be controlled by planning ahead. If your car is getting old then you replace it before it breaks down. Putting away a large amount of your earning each month allows you to not worry about losing your job. Try to think about the worst outcome of each situation and you can generally find a way to prevent or counteract it.

Keep an Open Mind
There is a great book titled “Who Moved My Cheese” that talks about how change will happen whether we like it or not. The book has 2 humans and two mice stuck in a maze eating cheese. The humans get used to eating the cheese and make plans that it will always be there. They build their house close to it and believe they deserve the cheese. The mice on the other hand eat the cheese , but also continue to search for more cheese in the maze. When the cheese gets low, the mice leave to find a better place. The humans keep eating until one day they are surprised to find there is no cheese.

Keep an open mind to change. Change can be scary because the outcome is unknown, it can also bring better benefits. The next cheese you find may be much tastier and larger than the one you are eating right now. Embrace change and you will find it’s not so bad.

Find the Opportunity
Things won’t always turn out how you planned. I went to Tokyo after graduation thinking I had found the perfect job. Instead I woke up in what seemed like a nightmare. But I was able to learn a lot from it about what I wanted out of work and eventually found something much better. I later found that I didn’t enjoy living in Tokyo as much as I had hoped, but I was able to use the experience I had there to move to a better place. Having constant unexpected expenses in college taught me to be a much better spender with my money. Being turned down at one apartment allowed me to find a much better one with a cheaper price.

The point is that when bad things happen they seem horrible. If you look at it for opportunities you can usually find at least one. It may just be one of these opportunities that makes the best changes in your life.

When I am making a big decision, and many times even for the smaller ones, I tend to consult my friends and family. Doing so has helped me make a lot of good decisions and pass on a lot of bad ones. It is a great idea to learn from others mistakes. However, there are also times when you must trust your own judgment and pursue your own goals regardless of what people tell you. This is especially true when you are doing something out of the normal.

If you decide to do something out of the ordinary, something new, or something that is difficult; your friends and family may try to advise you against it. Now it is important to listen to someone who has been through a similar situation, but just because they failed does not mean that you will as well. In fact, understanding their failure may help you succeed.

There will also be people who tell you that something is impossible even though they themselves have never done it. Even though they know very little about the subject and may have no experience, they may be able to give you a million reasons why you can’t do it. Though they are really giving you reasons why they can’t do it. If someone is afraid to do something they also want everyone else to be afraid. If everyone is afraid then it is the normal and they can feel better about it.

I have made a number of decisions in my life that have been out of the normal and I have received quite a bit of resistance from friends and family at times. Choosing to study in Japan, to work in Tokyo, and now to quit my job and start my own business to name a few. There are a few things I have done that have allowed me to follow and succeed at my dreams.

1. Research- Try to gain as much information about a subject as possible. The more you know about something the less risky the decision is.
2. Know yourself-know your limitations, strengths, and weaknesses when starting something.
3. Finish what you start- The more you complete the confidence and motivation you will gain.
4. Know who to ask for advice- Some people give much better advice than others. Note it may not always be the advice you want to hear.
5. Think big- Set your goals high. These are usually the things with the biggest rewards.
6. Don’t be afraid to fail- Some of the biggest successes come from huge failures. You will never learn if you are afraid to fail.
7. Tell the “negative people” once you have already started- They will be much less likely to try and stop you are moving forward.

I have received a lot of great advice over the years, but I have also received a lot of bad advice. The one important thing is to follow your dreams. If you want something bad enough and are willing to persevere, then you can do it.